Grief is not something you get over — it's something you carry differently
There is no correct way to grieve and no fixed timeline. Some people feel numb for weeks. Others cry immediately. Many swing between both. Grief is not a linear process — it circles back, changes shape, and resurfaces at unexpected moments long after the funeral is over.
What this article covers: where to find grief support in Singapore, what the difference between normal grief and complicated grief is, and when to consider professional help.
If you are still in the early days after a loss and looking for practical help with the funeral or what to do next, see What To Do When Someone Dies in Singapore.
What normal grief looks like
Common reactions in the weeks and months following a loss include:
• Intense sadness, crying, or emotional numbness • Difficulty concentrating or completing daily tasks • Sleep disturbances — sleeping too much or too little • Loss of appetite or overeating • Anger — at the deceased, at yourself, at circumstances • Guilt — replaying conversations, wondering if you could have done more • Physical symptoms — fatigue, headaches, chest tightness • Social withdrawal • Searching for the person — expecting to hear their key at the door, reaching for the phone to call them
These are normal. They do not mean something is wrong with you. Most people find that the intensity of these reactions eases over time, though grief rarely disappears entirely.
When grief becomes a concern
Grief becomes a concern — and professional support becomes valuable — when:
• Intense grief does not ease at all after several months • You are unable to carry out basic daily functions (work, eating, hygiene) for an extended period • You experience thoughts of self-harm or that life is not worth living • You are using alcohol, substances, or other behaviours to cope • You feel completely unable to accept that the person is gone • Relationships with other family members are breaking down • You experienced a traumatic death — sudden, violent, or unexpected
This is called complicated grief or persistent complex bereavement disorder. It is not a sign of weakness. It is a recognised condition that responds well to professional support.
Free grief support in Singapore
| Organisation | Service | Cost | Contact |
|---|---|---|---|
| Assisi Hospice | Individual bereavement counselling, support groups, nature therapy programme | Free | assisihospice.org.sg |
| HCA Hospice | CAREs bereavement programme — 6 touchpoints over 6 months post-death | Free | hca.org.sg |
| Singapore Hospice Council | Directory of community bereavement service providers | Free (directory) | singaporehospice.org.sg |
| Agency for Integrated Care (AIC) | Bereavement support resources and referrals | Free | aic.sg |
| MyLegacy@LifeSG | Counselling services directory | Free (directory) | mylegacy.life.gov.sg |
| Samaritans of Singapore (SOS) | 24-hour crisis helpline | Free | 1-767 |
💡 Tip
Assisi Hospice's bereavement care services are open to anyone in Singapore — you do not need to have been a patient or family member of Assisi Hospice to access them. Services are free of charge.
Paid grief counselling in Singapore
For families who prefer private, one-on-one therapy with more flexibility in scheduling and approach:
• Talk Your Heart Out (TYHO) — online and in-person grief counselling, multiple therapists available • Insightful Counselling — grief, bereavement, and loss specialisation, multiple modalities including EMDR • griefcounselling.sg — specialist grief counsellor with evidence-based approaches • The Life Celebrant (TLC) — bereavement services in collaboration with a panel of partners
Typical fees for private grief counselling in Singapore range from S$100–S$200 per session. Some insurers cover counselling — check your Integrated Shield Plan or employee benefits.
Support for children and young people
Children and teenagers grieve differently from adults. They may not have the language to express what they feel, and may cycle between visible distress and apparently normal behaviour. This does not mean they are unaffected.
If a child in your family is struggling after a loss: • Tinkle Friend — national toll-free helpline for primary school-aged children: 1800 274 4788 • School counsellors are trained in grief and loss and can provide support during school hours • Some hospice bereavement programmes specifically accommodate younger family members
For teenagers: mindline.sg has a self-assessment tool for emotional wellbeing.
Practical things that help in the first weeks
Professional support is not the only form of grief support. Practical steps that many families find helpful in the early weeks:
• Let people help — accept offers of food, company, and errands • Don't make major life decisions for at least 3–6 months if possible • Maintain basic routines — meals, sleep, light movement • Visit the columbarium or memorial site when you feel ready — not on someone else's schedule • Keep the person's memory alive in small, intentional ways • Give yourself permission to laugh, to be distracted, and to have good days
For ongoing connection with your loved one's memory, see Columbarium Singapore and Sea Burial Singapore for where to visit and hold them close.
💡 Tip
If you are in the early days after a loss and need someone to talk to — not a therapist, just a calm, human voice — Kenneth is available. He has sat with many families through the hardest hours. WhatsApp +65 9112 1226.
